Monday, October 31, 2011

One Year Ago, Today...

...I made the biggest decision of my life. This is always going to be a very special date for me. Last year, on Halloween Day, I knew in my heart, without-a-doubt, that Jie Jie was my daughter. I remember praying, as I drove to Costco, for guidance on this. In my heart I already knew, it was just wrapping my head around it. I went into Costco, and without thinking, put the Asian Berenguer doll, now known as Bao Bao, into my cart. I didn't realize at that moment what I was doing, as silly as that sounds. But, a little later when I unloaded that doll from the cart and put it into my car, it struck me that I just bought my daughter her first doll. The decision was made.

After finishing with the trick-o-treaters, I checked my email and found that the SWI had sent me several pictures of Jie Jie taken that day. Much later learned that they were the same pictures that they took to update her file. It was amazing to have decided to adopt this little girl and then to get so many pictures, without asking, on the very same day.

It's very rare to be in contact with the SWI at this time. I didn't realize that it went against normal protocol. I'd originally emailed them after learning that Jie Jie was having surgery and I was curious to know how the surgery went. I was actually advocating to find Jie Jie before realizing she and I were going to be together.

This day, actually almost to the second, last year, was one of the highest of highs I've ever felt. I had made the biggest decision of my life and was super excited to proceed. I stared endlessly at my daughter all day today, these precious remembrances and feelings filling my heart.

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