Friday, July 20, 2012

Turned the Corner?


As you can probably figure out, this joining of mother and daughter has been pretty rough. My guide had a serious dicussion with Sissy today, but this afternoon we had an incident worse than anything so far. It was bad and in public. Fortunately, the Chinese onlookers were supportive of me and when I pointed out how many were staring at Sissy, she began to recover. However, tonight, it seems I passed the test and she is contrite, begging me not to tell her orphanage mother, and she's apologized and promised to behave well from now on. I certainly hope she can do it because what happened today hit the limit of what I can physically do to control her. My back is killing me.

She is obscessed with contacting her friends in the US who have been adopted ahead of her. I'm beginning to wonder if that's been her primary goal for adoption. I've told her that she may not have any computer priviledges in the US until she is settled and behaving very well. She seems to understand, but keeps asking.

Today while making my way from Shamian Island to the Pedstrian Shopping Street, I found myself in the middle of Digital Central China and picked up a camera battery charger for about $5. Starting tomorrow, I hope to have my regular camera up and running soon.

Again, Jie Jie through it all has been a champion. I am more than grateful for her stroller, which shielded her from much of what her sister did today.

Please pray for Sissy, specifically that she will make it through one day with good behavior.

8 comments:

kimjax said...

I'm so sorry! Will keep praying - she's testing your limits and seeing where they are. Knowing you have them will make her feel secure. Hang in there, friend. Michael is so helpful!

nancy said...

I am praying for you Jie Jie and Sissy. I know how hard this could be for you, my first daughter's adoption went wonderful, she was a sweet pleasant baby. However, my second daughter's adoption was rough, she was a toddler with many behavioral issues. We got through it and a few years after her adoption, she was diagnosed with ADHD, which later explained so many of her behaviors. She's doing much better (still a challange at times, but we love her and her sister so dearly. Our Lord will guide all of you, and Sissy will need time (as will you and Jie Jie) to adjust to the many changes taking place in your lives now. Blessings to you and your precious daughters.

Just the 6 of us! said...

Waking up this morning I was hoping for
"good" news for the World. Between the horrible shooting in Colorado and your "Sissy" not realizing how good she's got it. I wish I could go back in time to when she was a baby and bring her to you. You are an amazing Momma. She will come around but like you said it is a grieving process. Plus she feels the need to test you. She wants to see if this is permanent. Older adopted kids often "act out" to see if you will leave them just like their first mother did. I know you would never do that. But Sissy doesn't yet. But she will. She will know that you are hers and she is yours. Forever. Hang in there. It can only get better from here.

Sherri said...

I don't know what to say to encourage you but I am whispering a prayer that you will be given wisdom and strength. And I agree with you...the best way for these children to adapt to their new families and home is to limit computer time drastically. I thought I couldn't stand it but we received much encouragement from others who have walked this pathway. And really, just think if WE moved to Ch*na and talked to our US friends daily. We would probably never truly become close to our Ch*na friends.

shelley said...

I am praying the God speak to Sissy's heart in her special heart language to help with behavior. We can't imagine all that she is going through....so glad she has you to help. I have read your blog since you got Jie Jie and I KNOW you are the best mom for Sissy. Hang in there...we are all praying for you.

Joannah said...

Just got caught up on your last five posts. I'm sorry you are having a hard time with Sissy, and that she is having a hard time. Sigh... You are very wise, and very direct, and I think you will find a way to work with her and guide her in adapting to her new life. Hang in there! :)

Annette said...

What a whirlwind of change for all of you. It will take time--lots of time--to grow relationship and trust. Our family will be praying for you, Jie Jie, and Sissy.

Maureen said...

I just read this posted by a mom who has adopted several teens from China. This is a letter one of her teens has written to newly adopted teens from China. If you click on the link at the bottom it is translated into Chinese.

http://wwwourchinagirl.blogspot.com/2012/07/chloes-letter.html

Good luck! You are in my prayers.