Friday, December 21, 2012
This & That
It's been so much nicer at home without things constantly disappearing. I was able to learn from the attachment specialist that Sissy's behavior isn't sadistic, but to her, if I was angry at Blossom, I couldn't love Blossom, therefore, I must love Sissy and she felt safe.
I've had several people suggest I give Sissy some kind of control. The attachment therapist did not mention this at all. The most popular example from those suggesting I give her some control is to allow her to pick out her clothes. I wish it was that easy! I DID tell her to pick out her own clothes one day this week. You'd think after 5 months she'd know her own wardrobe enough to be glad to do it. She came downstairs well-dressed and I thought, "See, she can do it." However, later in the day, I found out that she immediately went upstairs and asked Jie Jie for help, which means she totally didn't try. So, Jie Jie picked out Sissy's clothes!
I was able to do my Christmas shopping tonight because my neighbor kindly offered to stay with the girls after they were in bed. I went to one of the major craft stores and did very well, too well. I wanted to keep things a bit more simple gift-wise, but there were wonderful things that will be useful homeschooling tools. I'm looking forward to seeing them use the things that they will be receiving.
Jie Jie will be having another blood test tomorrow to look at her platelet count. At her routine blood test last week, I found out that her platelets were low, a normal thing to happen when one is ill, but Jie Jie has had back-to-back viruses since Halloween. Her pediatrician isn't concerned, but her nephrologist is. Apparently, in some cases, if the platelet count gets too low, the body will attack them. The test tomorrow is to make sure that the count isn't dropping further. Jie Jie finally felt better today, so, hopefully, her body is starting to make more platelets faster than she using them up. She's so full of life and so healthy, on the surface, that it's always a bit of a shock to get new worrisome news.
Blossom is still cruising along in the right direction. She is very, very bright and her English is noticably better week to week. She is processing what Sissy did to her and my role in it and how it shaped my relationship with her. As I get to know her better, I am starting to learn how she processes what she takes in. She ponders things for a long time. She has sensitive feelings and I'm learning to approach her differently when she appears to be starting to act up. I am heading off more and more tantrums and helping her face her difficulties, which often turn out to be very small frustrations that she can overcome with reassurance, redirection, practical help.
I fluctuate throughout the day wondering what the future holds for Sissy. One moment I have hope for her and the next it feels like she'll never learn. I think this is par for the course. I'm gearing up to start drawing her out and closer to me again, something she is loath for me to do, since I found out her deep secret and twarted her by stopping the stealing and her lying. As I passed the 67 month mark since my original log-in date with CCCWA, and making progress with my daughters, I am starting to feel Apple close. It feels good to be able to see a future again and dream and plan.